LOST IN TRANSLATION...

in honor of tuesday (which of course is my favorite tv day)

i present to you my current thoughts on LOST.

i'm just here to give my inconsequential musings.

they are lacking any intellectual theories,

but may contain spoilers SO STOP READING IF YOU'RE NOT CAUGHT UP

(fulghums, luttrells, and karen, i'm talking directly to you).

ILANA-

there's something about you i can't quite figure out.

probably because whenever i look at you i spend all my time

thinking how you remind me of an european ana lucia.

CLAIRE-

i miss your beautiful, worthy of a shampoo commercial hair.

and the way "peanut butter" sounds with your accent.

i'd give anything to watch you and charlie sit on the beach again with little bambino aaron.

SAWYER-

you had me at lafleur.

oh how i miss your hippie days with juliet.

oh how i miss juliet for that matter.

can i please have a nickname?

LIBBY-

where for art thou libby?

are we ever going to get more info. about you?

am i the only person in the world that still wonders about you every episode?

LOCKE-

i wish i could have had you as a sub in high school.

you would have been my favorite.

yes, even above ms. trotter, the legendary sub at my alma mater.

and if i was back in high school, my locker combination would most definitely be 4, 8, 15, 16, 23, 42.

LOCKE (AKA LOCKE-NESS MONSTER)-

who are you and why are you so frustrating to me?

more importantly, why is richard alpert scared of you?

i've never seen him shaking in his boots perfectly coiffed hair until you.

BENJAMIN LINUS-

i'm thankful to say the older my son gets,

the less he looks like you in the middle of the night.

i do still call him "benjy" from time-to-time.

CHILDREN OF MINE-

it's been brought to my attention that both your middle names are lost characters.

please know they are also both family names.

and we started watching the show after both of you were already born.

however, should we ever have a third (or fourth) child i will feel obligated to chose his or her middle name accordingly.

no, hurley is not in the running.

if you need me this evening,

i can be found on the couch with a dharma beverage in one hand

and an apollo bar in the other.